Do you feel disappointed with who you are as a person?
For me, there was a time in my life when I used to despise who I was as a person. In fact, I felt this way for the majority of my life: twenty-four years to be exact. Twenty-four years of wondering why I had to be different in comparison to everybody else. Twenty-four years of doing everything I could do in order to fit in. And twenty-four years of hating not only each and every single one of my differences, but also who I was as a person.
Just to give you a little retrospect, I am the type of person who would rather stay at home on a Saturday night and watch movies with my family instead of going out with friends. It’s not that I am against spending time with my friends, I just don’t really like large crowds.
But what I have learned over the last year is that it’s okay to be different. I mean, everybody has their differences, and it is those differences that make life exciting and worth living. The people who I used to think of as being “normal” have differences as well, just in their own different ways. And while you may not believe it, being different is your greatest superpower.
6 ways to stop feeling disappointed with who you are as a person.
1. Know that you are enough just the way you are.
You were born the way you were for a reason. You weren’t born just to fit in and live an average life, you were born to make the most out of every opportunity that life throws at you.
Trust me, I have spent more of my life trying to be somebody that I wasn’t meant to be just so that I could fit in. At the end of the day, it wasn’t worth it even in the slightest bit. Had I of accepted my differences and loved them for making me the amazing person that I am, I would have found happiness a lot earlier in my life.
2. Quit trying to be perfect.
I want you to know something: know that there is no such thing as perfection.
Too often I would find myself trying to be perfect, and if I was not perfect, I would beat myself up over it. See where I’m going with this? I spent all of my time beating myself up over something that wasn’t attainable.
No matter how skilled you might be at something, you will never be perfect. Not even the best of the best are perfect, there will always be room for improvement. So instead of trying to be perfect, focus on being the best that you can be. Use every obstacle that stands in your way as an opportunity to challenge yourself and improve on who you are as a person.
3. Realize all that you have already overcome.
Life is a marathon, not a sprint. Whether you know it or not, you have already overcome more obstacles in your life than you can ever imagine. All while rarely giving yourself the credit that you deserve.
Collectively, all of the obstacles that we have encountered and overcome in life outweigh any one obstacle that we are going to face in the future.
What does this mean? It means that if we have had the strength to overcome the obstacles that we have already faced, then there isn’t anything that we can’t overcome. It means that we are strong and that we can achieve anything that we set our minds to.
4. Focus on controlling what you can control: yourself.
One of the reasons I was always left feeling disappointed in myself was because I was trying to control others’ opinion of me. The truth is, though, we can’t control how others act or think. The only person that we can control is ourselves.
People are always going to have different opinions of you. It doesn’t mean that they are right or wrong, it is just their thought: their thought that you will never be able to control.
If you can’t control something, then don’t worry about it. Instead, focus solely on the things that you can control. Focus on loving yourself for the beautiful person that you are, focus on working as hard as you can, and focus on loving every minute of your life because you will never get that minute back.
5. Take risks on yourself.
If you want something that you don’t have, then you need to do something that you haven’t done. This means that you need to be willing to break out of your comfort zone and try new things.
Learning to take risks on yourself is scary at first, but you have to realize that it is the only way you will ever grow from who you are now into the person that you want to become.
Plus, life is meant to be exciting and full of memories. If you don’t take a chance on yourself, then you won’t be able to create either. The worst thing that can happen is that you make a mistake. When you make a mistake, learn from it, get right back up, and go at it again.
6. Mind over matter.
A lot of what we feel in life is a direct result of what we believe will happen.
Thinking negative thoughts is not going to help anybody. If we believe that we are going to fail, then we are probably going to fail. But if we believe that we will succeed, and as long as we are willing to put in the work, then we will do just that.
Simply put, if you want to stop feeling disappointed in yourself, then you first need to change your mindset. Quit beating yourself up for every small mistake that you make.
Instead, learn to encourage yourself, tell yourself that you can and will achieve whatever it is that you put your mind to, and stay positive. That is how you will find happiness and success in your life.
No matter what happens today, strive to live a better tomorrow.
Maybe today was bad, or maybe it was one of the best days of your life. The good news for both situations is that you have the opportunity to do it again tomorrow.
Let go of the past, focus on the present, and embrace all that is to come in the future. Life is too short to not love the gifts that surround you, so be grateful for what you have, and never give up on the things that you desire.
Michael Bonnell
5/3/2019
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