Through All The Pain, Here’s What I Would Do Differently

through all the pain
through all the pain

I often look back on all of the mistakes that I have made throughout my life and ask myself what was I thinking? What was my motivation or mindset that lead me towards making the mistakes that I made?

Now I know that I won’t be able to ever go back and do it all over again, but what I can do is learn for the future and try to help others from making the same mistakes that I have made over the years.

Through all of the pain and misery that I put myself through, here’s what I would do differently. Actually, there is only one thing that I would do differently. It has nothing to do with redoing the mistakes themselves, learning to overcome the pain that I endured, or learning how to have perfected a certain skill.

The only thing that I would do differently, is I would have taken the time to invest in my overall well-being, and I would have focused on the importance of self-love sooner in my life than I had.

Once you learn to believe in yourself and love yourself for who you are, oh man, you will be unstoppable.

You might be thinking that this is a naive way to look at it. I mean, really? Through all of the pain and heartache that I put myself through, this is the best piece of advice that I have for you?

To answer that, yes.

I may not have enjoyed some of the past experiences that have occurred in my life, I may not have enjoyed the feeling of falling flat on my face and failing, and I may not have enjoyed the pain that I felt. But honestly, I wouldn’t want it any other way.

It is all of the pain that I have endured that has shaped me into the person who I am today, and today, I am truly living my best and happiest life yet.

Don’t get me wrong, this doesn’t mean that I want to continue to feel that same amount of pain and struggle throughout the duration of my life, but how else should I look at it?

Without experiencing the pain and struggle that I had, I would never have found the strength in myself that I hold now. Because of it, my relationships with others are stronger, my relationship with myself is far better, and my love for life so so much greater. All of this is thanks to the pain and heartache of my past.

The way I see it, there really isn’t any other option or way to look at it. Too often we allow our pain and struggles to stand in the way of achieving all of the things that we want to achieve in life.

But why? Why do we limit ourselves to the point of crippling our abilities?

We will never be able to change anything that has happened in the past, so instead of trying to do so, stop limiting yourself, learn from your past, and let it help to shape both your present and your future.

Dwelling on the past will only do more harm than it will do good. I know this to be true because this is what I have done for a good part of my life. Pain itself didn’t make my struggles seem unbearable to shake: dwelling on them and my attitude towards overcoming them did.

When you focus on learning to believe in yourself and all that you are capable of achieving, your life will change in more ways than you could have possibly imagined. You will be stronger, you will be wiser, and you will be happier. Self-belief is probably the one single thing that changed my life the most, and I truly believe that it will do the same for you.

Maybe you don’t know where to start. Maybe you are experiencing such darkness in your life to the point where you don’t believe that there is a way out. My advice: start small. Start by telling yourself that you are good enough, that you will achieve all of your dreams, and that you deserve to live a good life.

You wouldn’t be lying to yourself because it’s the truth. You are good enough, you will achieve your dreams, and you do deserve a good life. Some just need help finding the light at the end of the tunnel. As long as you never stop believing in yourself and never give up, though, that light will appear. Just keep believing and have faith.

Michael Bonnell

5/9/2019

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