The Benefits Of Being Rejected

Hidden benefits of being rejected
Hidden benefits of being rejected
Photo by Mamihery Razafindramamba

Daily Blog #298

Here’s the truth, whether you know it or not, rejection is going to make your life better. It’s strange to think about, right! How can something negative make our lives better? Well, for many reasons. Rejection doesn’t just test our belief in ourselves, it also takes away all of the entitlement that we feel, and it forces us to focus on the things that we truly want to get out of our lives. Let me explain what I mean.

I used to live by one rule, and one rule only. That rule – to be accepted at all costs. Forget how I looked, forget about any of my morale values, I lived for acceptance. Not just acceptance from my friends, but acceptance from anyone that I ever met, and even strangers that I have never, nor probably will ever meet.

After many years of seeking acceptance but only finding rejection, my sole focus became to do whatever was required to live a life that everybody envied. Let’s just say that this mindset didn’t help my cause. In fact, because I was willing to give up on my beliefs in search of acceptance, guess what happened? Yep, it led to more rejection and to an even greater sense of entitlement.

There are two forms of entitlement that this type of mindset can lead to. The first form being where we think that the world owes us something. Either we have been hurt for far too long and because of the pain that we have endured, we deserve to have something good happen without working towards it. That, or we are just that full of ourselves and think that we walk on water.

This leads to the second form of entitlement, the type where we think we can fix everything. We try to find a resolution without holding others accountable to their action, because we somehow feel responsible for the actions of others. That, or we didn’t help somebody enough, which is why they did what they did, which is why we are responsible to fix it. Take a moment to process this.

Both examples of entitlement focus on two things: attention, and acceptance. And do you know what value attention and acceptance will provide for you? Absolutely none. Sure, you may feel a quick high of self-confidence from receiving some levels of attention or acceptance, but it will never provide true value to your life.

What will provide value to your life, though, is rejection. See, not only does rejection show you who is truly going to be there for you when you experience difficulties in life, but it also shows you if you will be there for yourself. It will show you how much you believe you are capable of achieving, and it will show how hard you are willing to work to achieve the things that you believe in.

Every single one of us faces rejection. We are either rejected by others, or we are presented with obstacles in our daily life that tests our will and desire. Those who fail in life see rejection as a sign that they should give up and move onto the next goal when the going gets tough, or that their goals are simply too difficult to accomplish.

Those who succeed (aka, you and I) see rejection as a learning opportunity. We see it as the test that it is, and no matter how badly the rejection might hurt, we are not willing to give up. We may lose the battle, but there is zero chance that we will lose the war.

The thing is, if you face rejection and decide to give up, you will never achieve your goals. But if you see rejection as an opportunity to improve, you will go from living a life full of what if’s, to living a life of what is!

Rejection shows who wants their dreams badly enough. It shows who is willing to fight for the things that matter to them, and it shows the amount a person is willing to work for their dreams. Need me to simplify this? Rejection will ultimately show who is going to succeed.

It isn’t easy, but those who are resilient are those who will be rewarded. Learn to love rejection, and learn to live a better life today than you did yesterday.

Michael Bonnell



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