Everybody has things in which they are good at in life. Some of these things we spend years chasing after to grow and develop our skills. Who knows, maybe if we put in enough time we will then eventually turn our craft into our profession.
But then there are the times in which we doubt ourselves. Times where we question the road that we are talking and if we actually have what it takes to achieve the lofty goals that we have set for ourselves. As time goes on without achieving these goals, our confidence slowly starts to diminish.
As humans, we do an excellent job of beating ourselves up. Just like how we focus on the negatives instead of appreciating the positives, we also beat ourselves up more often then we recognize all that we have already achieved. We all want to be happy in life, but when it comes time to confront our biggest critic, we are oftentimes forced to look in the mirror.
That’s right, we are our own worst enemy. If we didn’t continuously stand in our own way and sabotage our own success, there wouldn’t be anything that we couldn’t achieve.
Release Yourself From Your Own Burdens
I was never really the best at anything that I did growing up. With athletics, with academics, with relationships, I was always average at best.
After graduating from college, I decided to join my family in moving from Minnesota to Utah. I was abandoning everything that brought some level of comfort to my life in search of a fresh start.
I looked at Utah as a new opportunity. I was going to get a job, make amazing friends, go hit the slopes on the weekend, and life was going to be good. Nobody was going to know a thing about my past because it was just that – my past. As far as I was concerned, Utah was going to be the turning point in my life.
It didn’t quite work out like that, though. And the reason it never worked out is because I never allow it to.
My depression was worse in Utah than it was in Minnesota. I used the excuse of not having friends, not feeling comfortable with my surroundings, and the cultural differences for why I hated Utah, but the truth is, I never gave it a chance.
After six short months in Utah, I moved back to Minnesota. The result was much of the same. I used Utah as an excuse for pushing me away from my friends, for not feeling comfortable in the place where I once called home, and for why I was struggling to find a job. But the truth is, even when I moved back, I never really tried.
At the time I was focused on settling. I got a job that paid well, and it was for a company that I was incredibly passionate about. Despite getting the job, I still felt alone. I never went out with friends, I never sought adventure, and it felt as if my life was stuck on repeat.
I lived like this for two years after moving back to Minnesota until something finally clicked. As hard as it was to admit, I realized that nobody else was responsible for where I was at in life other than me, and it was now on my shoulders to create the life that I wanted to live.
While I am still and always will be a constant work in process, I can honestly say that today, I am living the best life that I have ever lived. I have released myself from a lot of the burdens from my past, and I want to share with you some tips on how I have managed to do so.
1. Follow Your Dreams
We are all told to be our own person, to make the most out of our dreams, and to live life to the fullest. But when it comes time to actually doing what we want to do in life, we often have to face judgment from the same individuals that are telling us to go after our dreams.
One thing that helped me to release myself from my own burdens was realizing that the life I am living is my life, and it’s the only life that I am going to get to live. It is not for others to live, it is not for others to tell me what to do, and it is not for others to determine my fate. I would never feel fulfilled if I lived a life in somebody else’s shadow, and this realization is one that helped me to gain control of my life.
No matter what we do, there are always going to be others who are going to judge us for living a certain way. Be judged for being the real you. Know what you want in life and follow your dreams. Not the dreams of others, but your dreams.
2. Focus On Progress Not Perfection
None of us are perfect, nor will we ever be. And despite knowing this, perfection is something that we all strive for on a regular basis. We get upset when others are better than us to the point where we feel discouraged and weak.
I used to look at myself as a failure any time somebody made more money than me, had a better job than I did, shot a better score in golf, got a higher grade on a test, or anything in which I was not the best.
As I mentioned earlier, there were very few things in which I was overly good at. Imagine how often I was beating myself up for not being the best. But when I learned to focus on progression instead of perfection, only then did I start to grow as a person. I no longer saw life as a competition against others, but rather as a competition against the person who I was the day before.
3. Believe In All That You Are Worth
Your greatest burden in life will always be how you perceive yourself. Whether you think you can or can’t, you’re right. If you want to go places in life, then the first thing that you need to do is to start believing in yourself.
I know that it sounds all too cliche, but believing in myself is what has helped me to turn my life around. Every morning I would wake up and start at a poster that I made filled with positive affirmations. For me, starting my morning with developing my self-confidence has helped me to carry over that attitude throughout the day.
When you train your brain to think a certain way over time, it naturally develops that way of thinking. It’s like a habit – when you do something enough, you develop that habit without having to intentionally think about it. The same goes for thinking. When you train your mind to think about the good in life and all that you can achieve, you develop a stronger mindset naturally.
We all need to realize that we are fully in control of our own lives. Not those around us, but ourselves. Whatever we want to do and whatever we want to be in life, it is up to fulfill our own destiny. The only way to do that is to release ourselves from our own burdens and continue to move forward no matter how difficult it may feel.
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