I Wasn’t Always This Strong

I wasn't always this strong
I wasn't always this strong

Daily Blog #321

I wasn’t always this strong. Strong in the sense where I know that there are very few things that can happen to me in life that could possibly break me. Probably the only thing that could break me is if anything were to ever happen to someone that I love.

But it wasn’t always this way. There was a time in my life where calling me a loser or finishing last in something would have probably thrown me in a downward emotional spiral. As a young man with no clear path in life, I was broken to pieces. Anything but the best was unacceptable, and it resulted in all of my confidence being washed away.

I got home this morning from grabbing my niece some pancakes from McDonald’s. Along with her pancakes came a biscuit. I absolutely hate biscuits. Not because they taste bad, but because that was the name that others used to tease me with. They knew I hated the name Biscuit, and the more emotion I showed when they would call me it, the more that they and others would gain pleasure through my misery.

In talking with my brother-in-law, I suddenly realized how stupid it all was. It’s not just the name that is stupid, but also the fact that I actually cared. I let this name haunt me for years all because a few of my peers thought it was funny. Now I’m looking back and thinking to myself, “Really, that’s all you got?” But I am also questioning myself in why I allowed such a meaningless name to impact my life as much as it did.

Not to sound macho in any way at all, in fact, it’s a little cowardish, but if someone who was smaller than me (mind you, very few were) ever called me that name, it probably resulted in a few pushes or punches being thrown. This doesn’t make me tough. It makes me weak. I wasn’t any better than the kids who used to tease me because I was taking my emotions out on only those who were weaker than I was.

When you are in the heat of the moment, or at a weak point in your life, it isn’t always easy to control your emotions. But in looking back on how that name used to bother me and how I would react to it, I can now see how weak I truly was.

Despite the emotional or physical pain that you might be going through, remember that the battle is won or lost in your own mind with only yourself fighting it. The war, well that is your willingness to control your perception of any given situation and how you allow that situation to impact your life moving forward.

If you allow negativity into your mind, then your thoughts and emotions will reflect as such. But if you look for the good in the challenges that you are going to face in life, the more that you will persevere, and the more likely you will be to succeed.

Everybody fights their own different and unique battles. Those who excel find a way to overcome adversity by either ignoring a meaningless obstacle, or by remembering all that they have already overcome in life and embracing any challenge knowing that they have the strength to overcome any obstacle that stands in their way. This is the mindset that you should strive to have.

On the other hand, those who get trapped in their own emotions only do so because they either engage in self-doubt, or because they feel some sense of self-pity. The thing is, though, the world will very rarely feel sorry for you. So whatever you do, try to find your inner belief, and stay away from this.

When you think that life is going against you, remember that there is always someone out there who has it worse. Remember that there is someone who is suffering right along with you, and someone who is nowhere near as blessed as you are. I am not saying this to make you feel good about yourself. I am saying this because it is the truth.

Whenever you are feeling weak, or whenever you feel like giving up, reflect on all that you have already overcome in life. Dig deep and reflect on all of the pain, all of the challenges, and all of the difficult experiences that you have not only endured over the course of your life, but all of which you have overcome as well. That is how you will find the strength within yourself when you need it the most.

You are one strong being that is capable of far than what you give yourself credit for. You just need to be willing to believe that you are. The more you believe in your true strength, the more you true strength shines when you need it the most. And trust me, once you find the strength that already lies within you, very little can stop you from achieving any and every goal that you set out to achieve.

Michael Bonnell

3/17/2019

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