Daily Blog #332
I can’t tell you the number of times that I have bailed on plans simply because I wasn’t committed to the plan in the first place. It got to the point where my friends even started calling me a flake and then eventually quit inviting me to things because they knew that I probably wouldn’t show up. And the worst part about this all is that I felt the same way. I quit giving myself opportunities to succeed, opportunities for excitement, and opportunities to make memories. All because I knew that I probably wouldn’t follow through on my own commitments.
This lack of commitment often carried over to the goals that I set out for myself over the course of my life. All of the times that I told myself that I wanted to eat healthier and gain some muscle. The times when I told myself that I was going to start breaking out of my comfort zone and go out with friends on the weekends. Or the times when I told myself that I was going to give up drinking soda. Was I committed and expecting myself to achieve these goals? No. So then why did I bother setting them in the first place?
What do you think happened when I would set goals for myself and give up on them after a short amount of time? It’s not that I quit setting goals, but I quit believing that I could actually achieve them. This is one of the biggest goal setting mistakes that you must avoid if you want to achieve anything!
Too often we set immense goals for ourselves and go balls to the walls for the first few days. I know I’m not the only person that does this. You set a crazy big goal, perhaps of expecting to set yourself up for financial freedom in a years time, and when you see how much time, effort, and dedication it requires, you give up on that goal.
What happened to me will then happen with you as well. Over time of setting goals for yourself, your commitment level will slowly start to diminish. Not long after, you will find yourself achieving very few of the goals that you set out to achieve (if any at all), and you will start to lose all sense of self-belief in yourself. You will set a goal, question if you can do it, and slowly start to feel like you don’t have the strength to achieve much of anything.
“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t — you’re right.” -Henry Ford
It all starts with getting back to the basics. Goal setting isn’t meant to feel like the lottery. You don’t want to just set a goal and hope that a miracle happens where it comes true. No, you want to achieve your goal(s) no matter how many you set because you know that you are capable of doing exactly that.
The best way to start (and this answer might tick you off a little) is to start small. Again, we are notorious for setting massive goals for ourselves that we have very little faith in ourselves that we can actually achieve them. Instead of doing this, we need to raise our confidence, we need to know what it feels like to achieve a goal, and only then can we start to increase the size of our goals.
We are not trying to become multi-millionaires overnight, or to achieve the voice like Beyonce with a week’s worth of vocal training. We are trying to set ourselves up for success in the long, but the very unpredictable game that is called life. And the only way to do so is to have the confidence in ourselves that we can actually achieve the goals that we are setting out to achieve.
Maybe you have a goal of losing a few pounds before summer hits. Perfect, then get your butt into the gym once or twice a week. Don’t start by going five times because we all know the likelihood of achieving something that. Not to say that you can’t, but you will feel like a marathon runner who sprints off the starting line. Sure you might feel good for the first few days, but as the race drags on, your energy and commitment will decrease. Start by going to the gym once or twice a week. Only once you are committed to doing that should you then start adding a day, two days, or three days to your schedule.
If you have a goal giving up pop (soda), the same thing applies. Going cold turkey will cause nothing but migraines, mood swings, and endless amounts of misery. Start slowly cutting back, show yourself that you can actually do this, and then start cutting back some more.
Once you develop the mindset that you can achieve the small goals that you set out to achieve, then you will start to gain confidence in yourself to achieve the larger goals that you set out to achieve. Again, life isn’t about who can reach the finish line the quickest, but rather who can reach the finish line and then has enough left over to keep going.
Start small and finish big. While life is short, we also can’t expect to achieve all of our goals immediately. Learn to work towards the goals that you want to achieve, work towards building your self-confidence, and work towards loving the life that you are living each and every single day. That is how you will win and achieve everything that you set out to achieve.
Previous Post: THE BEST WAY TO COMBAT YOUR FEARS