Fear Lives Inside Of Us All, But It’s Time To Stop Living In Fear.

fear lives inside of us all
fear lives inside of us all

Fear lives inside of us all. Whether it is a fear of money, a fear of a job loss, a fear of committing to a plan, or even something as simple as a fear of failing, we all have something that we fear in life.

It isn’t our fears themselves that prohibit us, though. It’s how we perceive our fears and how we choose to manage them that determines the impact that it has on our lives. We can either choose to live in the shadows of our fears, or we can once again reclaim the life that is ours to live.

We All Have Fears

Today I’m feeling a little vulnerable and know that if I don’t talk about this now, there is a good chance that I won’t ever talk about it. I want to be completely transparent and hold no secrets back in my life.

My family is probably the only ones who know this about me, but now I want to share it with you. I want you to see that no matter how much progress we make in life, no matter how many obstacles we have overcome, we will never be perfect. We all have our flaws, we all have weaknesses, and we all have things that we fear. But in order to overcome these fears, we first need to admit that they exist. 

My Biggest Fear

Here’s my fear: I have a fear of dating. There, I said it. Me, a twenty-five-year-old male has a fear of dating. While the vast majority of my friends are either married or in a relationship, I have not been on a date in six years. 

Now, I could sit here and make excuses for why I don’t date. I could say that my depression has caused me to have self-confidence issues, or that I have trust issues, or that I am just too damn cheap to take a female out on a date, but that wouldn’t be the truth. 

The truth is that I am just scared, and the more that time progresses since going on my last date, the more that fear slowly builds up inside of me. I don’t think that I am unattractive or anything like that, but just like everyone who encounters fear, my fear comes from within my own mind. 

I draw up these conclusions within my mind that prevents me from even asking a girl out on a date. What will I say? How do I know if she actually likes me? What happens next? All of these questions arise before even taking the first step. 

Now, mind you, these are imaginary conclusions that only exist in my mind, but they are strong enough to prevent me from taking action in my life. The truth is, I will simply never know the answer to these fears unless I actually take that first step and ask a girl on a date. 

As I’m writing this, yes, I do realize how childish this may sound to you, but it is very real for me. I can do heights, I can do spiders, I can do enclosed spaces, but I can’t ask a girl out. When I think about asking somebody out, all of my fears and doubts immediately come rushing back into my mind.

Fear Lives Inside Of Us All

Why am I sharing this with you? Because I want you to see that nobody is perfect. 

Despite all of the progress that I have made over the last year and a half, I still struggle with something that people half my age have no issues with. I may be progressing in life, but there are still many things that I need to continuously improve on if I want to be the best that I can possibly be.

That’s what life is about though, right? It’s not about being perfect. It’s about being the best you that you can possibly be.

It is natural to feel fear, especially if it is something that we are not familiar with. But that doesn’t mean that we should allow our fears to control the one and only life that we are blessed enough to get. It means that we should recognize our fears for what they are, admit our fears, and take the action(s) necessary to overcome those fears. If we don’t, then we will never be able to improve on them.

Fears are nothing but thoughts that lie within our minds. They are the thoughts that we create in order to feel a sense of safety and security. 

What they really do, though, is prevent us from making the most out of life. We allow them to stop us from taking risks, trying new things, and achieving all of the amazing things that we are capable of but never give ourselves a chance to try.

If you want to start achieving your dreams, then you need to find the strength to move past your fears. There isn’t anything in this life that you can’t achieve, so don’t let anything stop you from doing so. 

Believe in all that you are capable of doing, strive to become the best that you can be, and let none of your fears stop you from living your life.

Michael Bonnell

7/17/2019

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