Everything Is The Way It Is Because Of You

everything is the way it is because of you
everything is the way it is
Photo by: Jonathan Klok

The past is the past. It has already come, and it has already gone. No matter how difficult it might have been, no matter how much went wrong, there is simply nothing that you will ever be able to do to change it.

Everything has happened the way it has because you have in some form or another allowed it to. Whether it be carrying the emotional attachment, physical burden, or feelings of remorse and regret, you have allowed the past to control your present.

With the said though, we all have an opportunity that lies ahead. Surely we can’t change the past as it has already occurred, but we have the option to quit living in it. And since we won’t be able to change something that has already happened, why continue to let it consume our lives any more than it already has?

Experiences and emotions from your past will only control your life if you allow them to. Just know, though, that if you allow the past to control you, all you are doing is taking away from the precious time that you have remaining.

Holding yourself responsible.

Responsibility was never a word that I liked to hear, mainly because I used to lack and and all types. I would blame myself for my weaknesses, others for pointing out those weaknesses, and my surroundings for developing and displaying my weaknesses. But responsibility doesn’t mean that you have to take the blame. Blame has its own word. Responsibility is taking ownership of how you allow a situation to impact your life.

I used to be so caught up in my weaknesses to the point where I would overlook anything positive in my life. I was setting aside every attribute that already made me the incredible person who I already am just so that I could develop my weaknesses for the approval of others. Everything that came to me, both good and bad, is a direct result of what I allowed into my life.

Now, I get it. Some things just happen and we don’t always have say in the outcome. In fact, we very rarely have say in the outcome when it includes others. But that doesn’t mean that we have to allow these situations to consume us. The past is the past. Learn from it, grow from it, and move on from it.

From somebody who always used to run from having to take responsibility for anything in life, it was the change of taking responsibility that has actually helped me to become the person who I am today. Only once I took responsibility for my past and found the desire to learn from all of the mistakes that I mad was I then able to change my life in ways that I never imagined to be possible.

Responsibility isn’t something that we always like to possess, but it is a critical component to any amount or type of happiness and success. Without taking responsibility for your actions and emotions, how can one expect to make a decision in which they can truly benefit from?

As I said, we will never be able to change the past, so why would we continue to live in it and allow the past to control our present? It will only cripple and haunt us if we allow it to.

The choice is yours.

If your past is one in which you do not reflect positively on, then take responsibility for your part in allowing it to shape your actions and beliefs in the way that it has, and simply move on.

I say take responsibility for all that has happened to you because that is the only way to free yourself from it. Taking responsibility is to accept your part in the situation. It does not mean to blame, blame already has it’s own meaning. Taking responsibility means that you come to terms with what you cannot change and your role in how you allowed it to shape you. It has already taken enough of your life away from you, and if you do not act quickly, it will only take away more.

Always know that your past doesn’t define you. You are not your past. You are who your are today and what you allow your life to become from this point on. Take responsibility and recognize all that has happened for what it is, free yourself from the burden, and move on with your life.

In all areas of your life, everything is the way it is because of you. You can either live in the past, and ignore the present, or you can live in the present and accept the past for what it is – the past. The choice is yours to make, and it is my hope for you that you chose to let go because that is how you will find happiness and success in your life.

Michael Bonnell



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